They say
everything happens for a reason, but for some reason, I just don’t understand
why BSs need to happen these past few days. After the big change that happened
a few months ago, things have been different… way different – no horrible
bosses, no nosey coworkers, no absurd rules, and best of all, no STRESS. Well,
maybe there’s still stress; but it’s a different kind of stress this time.
On the other
hand, fate has been pretty tough with me lately. Maybe this is my punishment
for assuming that things will be instantly well after changing my life in just
24 hours; or maybe, shit just really happens all the time. I don’t want to be
overly pessimistic as much as possible but as my 26th birthday comes close, I
feel more and more helpless with the things that are happening right now. I
know I should do something about it to end this shit, but honestly, I just
don’t know what to do. Although people are already telling me what are the
things that I should do but for some reason, I just couldn’t do it. Maybe I’m
scared; or maybe I just don’t want to offend other people. Whatever the reason
is, I just really hope that things will be better on the 10th.
Speaking of my
forthcoming 26th birthday, I honestly don’t know what I would want to do with
it. Even if I’ve already made plans with friends and cousins about it, suddenly
I don’t feel like celebrating at all. It could have been because I’m still out
of budget, or maybe because there’s just no reason for celebrating it. Don't
get me wrong; I'm not at all concerned about getting old or whatever, I'm just
not at all excited with these "birthday celebrations." It could've
have also been because when I was young, we never really celebrate our
birthdays by coming up with a 'party'; usually, it's just going to the church
and eating out then done! Whatever, maybe tomorrow I'd be able to know what to
do by then.
So, people may
wonder, what is really going on here? Well, let's just say that things are not
as glamorous as I thought it would be. I may be facing a difficult time right
now and I can’t help but wonder: how long
will this continue? Should I just get used to it? How long will I have to wait
to reach my goals? Maybe I made a bad
decision… But if I were ever given the chance to choose between staying in this
situation or go back to my old routine, I'd rather stay right where I am
because at least here, I wouldn't have to deal with horrible bosses, nosey
coworkers, absurd rules, and stressful bitches who are so full of themselves
and thinks they have all the answers. Besides, I’ve already been in that
business for more than five years and didn’t receive what I deserve so why go
back? Plus, I don't need to think about how to treat all these pimples so
much anymore as I am already happy to where I am now. :)
--
"When you lie, Be Consistent. (="
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